


I'm Not Yours

by Yemi Hikari (Yemi_Hikari)



Series: Open Novella [14]
Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Contest Entry, Depression, Food Issues, Gen, Hypothermia, Misunderstanding, Moving to the city, One-Sided Abigail/Female Builder (Stardew Valley), One-Sided Abigail/Sebastian (Stardew Valley), Open Novella Contest, Open Novella Contest 2020, Slow Burn, harmful behaviors, self-deprication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-09
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:33:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 20,056
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25255465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yemi_Hikari/pseuds/Yemi%20Hikari
Summary: Sebastian struggled most of his life with social interactions. As such, he struggled with his childhood friend's decision to move back to Stardew Valley, yet when he finally attempts confronting Yuki regarding his feelings, things don't go to plan pushing him to go ahead and try leaving home. He finds himself at his half-brother on the other sides place.
Relationships: Maru & Sebastian (Stardew Valley), Maru/Original Male Character(s), Sebastian & Original Male Character(s)
Series: Open Novella [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1828204
Kudos: 1
Collections: (General) Open Novella 2020, MinorFandomFest, Platonic Relationships, Siblings





	1. Revelation

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer - I don't own Stardew Valley. This was one of my nine Open Novella projects. This one got through the first round, but not the second. While there were more people participating this year, the coronovirus cut down majroly on participation in the second round which cut down on the number of entries which could go through. That said, this definitely didn't turn out the way I wanted.

" _I'm moving back to Stardew Valley._ "

Sebastian's eyes blinked at the message on his computer screen. He quickly typed out a response. " _What do you mean?_ "

" _What do I mean? Aren't you the one always telling me about settling for working for one of the big corporations? I got tired of it, so I'm going to take over my grandfather's old farm like he wanted. I'll get to see you again._ "

His dark eyes looked at the words, befuddled, to say the least.

" _Sebastian? Are you still reading my messages? I've not seen you since you last visited your dad, but I'd really like to see you again._ "

Sebastian swallowed. He wanted to _see_ his childhood friend again, yet he didn't want _them_ to know how much of a loser he'd become, at least in his own mind. His eyes drifted down to the keyboard, only to dart back up upon hearing the sound of footsteps on the stairs. A sigh escaped his lips, his hand moving the mouse so he might hide the e-mail from prying eyes – prying eyes did, in fact, come down the stairs.

"Hi!"

"I'm busy Abigail. Work you know." Sebastian swallowed, his eyes darting away. What he said wasn't a lie given the fact he was checking his e-mail for computer programming jobs. For some reason, he decided to glance up at the unofficial addition to his duo with Sam.

"What kind of work could you possibly be doing?" Abigail flopped onto the couch, twirling a lock of purple hair she insisted she didn't actually dye to get said color. Her chirpy personality honestly clashed drastically with the dark mood he found himself in, yet he was far more concerned with the fact people were yet again not taking his computer programming work seriously.

"Never mind." Shaking his head, he pulled up a project hoping she wouldn't be too much of a distraction, wishing she'd for once take a hint. Nobody ever did.


	2. Avoidance

"I visited that old run-down farm today with the mayor."

Sebastian stopped at the top of the stairs, his hands reaching out for the walls to steady himself. He couldn't see his mother from where he was, yet something told him she waited at the front desk of her carpentry shop located near the entrance to their home listening for the opening of the door to his basement room as well as the sound of his footsteps indicating he was almost all the way up.

"That's nice."

His eyes closed upon hearing the voice of his stepfather from his lab. Robin knew full well Demetrius was likely reading his newspaper or working on some kind of experiment meaning she'd purposefully timed the start of her conversation for Sebastian's ears, though he honestly didn't know why.

"It's not the same as it was when Sebastian and Yuki were children, but I'd forgotten how small it was, that old farmhouse. She's actually grown in a rather fine young lady."

"Uh-huh."

"Do you remember Yuki, Sebastian?"

Sebastian closed his eyes, fully remembering Yuki, yet also remembering he'd not responded to her e-mail letting him know she'd be taking over her grandfather's old farm. He'd not told his mother she was coming either, something Robin would likely chew him out for if she knew. For some reason he decided to respond, making himself feel like an idiot. "I don't know what you're talking about."

He turned, heading back down the stairs so he could avoid his mother's attempts at interfering with his life. He arrived downstairs, finally deciding to open up the exchange between him and Yuki.

" _So, I didn't hear a response from you, so I still don't know if you got my message. When I get onto the farm, I won't have internet, at least not right away. That means we can't communicate this way for a while, but that doesn't really matter as we'll be in the same place and can visit each other. Be sure to stop by the farm. Looking forward to seeing you._ "

Sebastian let out a sigh, leaning back in his computer chair. "I didn't know it would be that soon." How long he sat there staring at the ceiling he didn't know, his mouth twisting slightly. Communicating over the internet was different from communicating face to face; one was able to hide things one didn't want others to know over the internet yet face to face there was no way Yuki wouldn't notice how socially disconnected he was. More importantly, connecting to people online felt so much easier than face to face.

" _Looking forward to seeing you._ "

" _Yet I'm dreading seeing you, though not because I don't want to..._ " Sebastian took a deep breath, closing his eyes.


	3. Pressure

Avoidance...

In the back of his mind, Sebastian knew he couldn't avoid Yuki forever.

For a while, he found relief in the fact his normal routine meant he rarely encountered anybody, including his mother, stepfather, and half-sister when he came out of his dark basement for something to eat or a quick smoke by the mountain lake. There weren't many who'd go into the mines adventuring, yet these were blocked off by a landslide.

Of course, this meant he couldn't go monster hunting down in the lower levels of the mines, leaving the one option for relieving the anxiety which habitually built up – going out to the mountain lake for a smoke. Robin, of course, didn't approve of either, considering the first unsafe and the second unhealthy. The fact she didn't approve didn't help his anxiety, which could lead him into a rather dark place emotionally he didn't want to go.

Avoidance was something he did a lot in his life; he found social interactions an unpleasant experience.

Of course, soda shooting out of one's nose was also an unpleasant experience, an experience brought on by the unexpected e-mail from someone he'd avoided communicating with for years. Specifically, he avoided visiting his father for a few years now and thus hadn't any face to face time with said person, nor had they chosen to communicate with him before now.

" _Yo. Long time no see. How are you doing?_ "

Sebastian took a deep breath, typing in a response. " _Why now?_ "

" _I heard through the grapevines regarding Yuki's plans. Are you excited about seeing her after all of these years?_ "

" _I'm confused. Why would you care? How do I know this isn't some elaborate plan of yours to make my life miserable?_ "

" _What do you mean? Don't you like Yuki?_ "

" _Don't you?_ "

The break-in conversation made Sebastian breathe a sigh of relief, hoping the person might not contact him again. In the back of his head..."

" _Is that why you didn't make a move? You thought I had feelings for Yuki? Is this why you've avoided visiting dad? He misses seeing you, by the way. I guess I should let you know I've moved out of the house, but I'm attending college in Zuzu City. By the way, I hope you feel like an idiot right now, but will stop acting like one. Hope you'll visit – wish I'd talked to you sooner so we could have gotten this cleared up sooner."_

Sebastian's jaw tightened – his reasons were far more complicated than that, yet...

"You shouldn't keep yourself cooped up like this."

He hadn't noticed his mother starting down the stairs let alone the opening of the basement door. He lifted a hand in an attempt to brush away her concerns. "I've been out to smoke, and..."

"It's Friday, Sebastian."

He finally looked up at his mother, feeling rather tired. "Friday. The day I go and play pool with Sam."

"Yes." His mother smiled at him, locks of red hair falling around her shoulders. Sebastian's eyes closed, mentally noting he looked so much like his father than he definitely looked mismatched in a household where Maru – his half-sister – actually looked like she belonged, given that she inherited Robin's hair color, but her skin color was an obvious blending of her two parents. His skin, on the other hand, was paler than Robin's, though she claimed this was due to the lack of sunlight.

Sebastian stood, letting out a sigh, shoving his pack of cigarettes into the pocket of his black sweat jacket. Even though he didn't plan on smoking, having them on him did relieve his anxiety somewhat. The mountain breeze blew over the path; Sebastian sucked in a deep breath before muttering, "It was more than that."

When he arrived at the Stardrop Saloon, the jukebox was going like usual, but Sam was already in the arcade area where the pool table was located looking at the soda machine. Sam turned, a perpetual smile on his face. Abigail sat on the couch, twiddling her fingers, which was normal given the fact she had a habit of showing up Friday nights despite never participating in the pool games.

Everything, of course, seemed normal.

"There's a new girl..." Sam's words made Sebastian miss the ball he was aiming at, giving Sam a chance. "She's rather cute."

"Oh, you mean Yuki?"

Sebastian took a deep breath, stepping back slightly, his eyes darting away. Mentally, he chewed himself out for not realizing the possibility of Yuki meeting Sam and Abigail. He swallowed, his fingers tightening around his own pool cue, the sweat starting to gather.

"Yeah, she's cute. Rather nice too. Stops in the convenience store a lot, but that makes sense since she's taking up that farm nearby."

Sam let out a chuckle. "I wonder if she's dating someone."

"Speaking of which..." Abigail took a deep breath.

"Shoot!" Sam let out a sigh, having – like usual – missed the ball he was aiming at. Sebastian's mouth twisted slightly.

"As I was..."

"Not now." Sam waved his hand. "The conversation is distracting me from my pool game."

Sebastian couldn't help but smile. "Are you sure that's why you're doing so badly?"

Sam always played badly. Sebastian shook his head, lining up his shot carefully, planning on not missing this time around. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Abigail become nervous, fidgeting as her eyes seemed to pick up on something, he wasn't aware of. Sam, however, noticed due to not having to focus on the game. "Oh, hi Yuki."

Sebastian of course missed but almost messed up the pool table with his cue stick when he did.


	4. Cloudy

Smoke billowed up from the cigarette held between the fingers of Sebastian's right hand. His mouth twisted into a deep frown, his anxiety not quite disappearing as he wanted – he might need to head into the mines for some adventuring, although his mother wouldn't like the fact he was doing so. He turned his head up so he might watch the smoke from his cigarette join the clouds.

The cool breeze which blew through the mountain area of the Stardew Valley was definitely much bearable than the heat he sometimes dealt with down in the town. In the back of his mind, he wondered if he should invite Sam over to play some video games or role-play so he might distract himself, yet there was a major chance Sam would bring up the fact he'd practically walked out of the Stardrop Saloon on everyone.

"Sebastian?"

Sebastian swallowed deeply, then slowly turned his head so he might look over his shoulder. His mouth opened, closing. He saw her long, dark hair cascading around her shoulders and then looked down, unable to keep eye contact. " _She didn't know I started smoking. I didn't want her to know I've started smoking._ "

"So..."

"Sorry about the other night." His dark eyes continued looking at the ground, yet he couldn't think of anything to say.

"That." He heard a sigh. "At least you're aware of what happened."

"I..." Sebastian swallowed again, completely unsure of what to say next. "You likely think I didn't want to see you."

"Do you want to see me?"

"I don't know." His stomach lurched slightly, unsure of whether that was the right thing to say. Chances are he flubbed it masterfully.

"I guess it's been a while, so that would make you a bit uncomfortable around me. I mean, we're strangers now, right?"

"Strangers..." That honestly didn't sound right, yet also in a way did. He looked up at her, swallowing again. "Um."

"So, I've met some of the villagers. Sam's rather outgoing."

"It's rather annoying." Sebastian flicked the cigarette, letting a few ashes fly.

"Well, that makes sense. You're the exact opposite."

He found himself looking her in the eye, puzzled regarding how she'd noticed. "Sorry?"

"Shouldn't I be the one apologizing?"

"Whatever for?"

"For making you feel uncomfortable, I guess." What she said made him look away, towards the mines. "Oh, I've gone into the mines a few times. I'm not trying to change the subject, but it seemed like you were looking in that direction."

"Um..." One hand reached up to rub the back of his neck. " _Tell her that you like her. Stop being a coward_ ," said one voice, while the other said, " _she deserves better than a loser like you._ "

"Yes, I'm definitely sorry for making you feel uncomfortable."

One of his eyes twitched. "Uh..."

"I'm also sorry for thinking things could just go back to the way they were."

" _What if I don't want things to go back to the way they were?_ " Sebastian wanted to lift the cigarette to his lips, yet he didn't want her to focus on the fact he was smoking now.

"At least not without a little effort on my part."

He found himself looking at her in the eye. " _What about a little effort on my part._ " He glanced away, as a realization hit her. " _No, a lot of effort on my part. It's not fair to her, but..._ " He glanced back. "I don't... um. This is awkward." His eyes blinked. "That's what I was avoiding. The awkwardness."

"Anyways, I'm off to the mine. I'm collecting quartz for Abigail."

"What?" He swallowed, a bit confused. He was used to thinking of Abigail as the one who hung around despite the fact he didn't want her too. The fact Yuki took an interest in her..."

"Mmm, well, she's a rather interesting response when you give her quartz."

"She does?"

"She says it's delicious."

"Sounds like Abigail." He glanced over at the carpentry shop. "You know, my mother, if you need any upgrades for the farm..." He stopped speaking, thinking he sounded like a billboard for his mother's business.

"She told me. It was nice seeing her again."

"I..." Sebastian crossed his arms. " _I don't mind if you talk for a bit._ " He wanted to say this, yet honestly couldn't.

"Anyways, it was nice seeing you again. I wish I could have said that the other night." He heard Yuki's footsteps on the ground, then looked up at her retreating back.

"Just my luck."

He had, after all, walked out of the saloon upon missing the shot, yet didn't bother going to his and Sam's usual Saturday jam session. He'd not bothered checking his e-mails, although he really did need to, simply because he knew Sam would be asking what happened. Letting out a sigh, he flicked his cigarette, making it go out so he might head back into the house, only to stop waling forward upon seeing a familiar face, her red hair cascading down around her shoulders.

"Sebby?"

"Mom?" He swallowed.

"I saw Yuki heading up this way. Did you get a chance to talk to her?"

"Sort of." He glanced away, wondering how many more times he would disappoint his mother. " _I could have tried to converse with her about games, comics, motorcycles – asked if she might want to go on a ride sometime._ " His teeth ground together in frustration. " _I don't even know if she's into those things like we were when we were kids, but asking her to ride my motorcycle? You heard her. Things aren't the way they used to be, and like the idiot I am I wanted to try taking things further._ "

Robin frowned as if catching sight of his frustration on his face. "It didn't go well."

"No. I don't think it did."

"I could..."

"Don't. Please don't." Sebastian started lifting the cigarette up to his mouth, stopping when his mother continued speaking.

"Sebastian, you know I don't like you smoking, but I said I'd put up with it if you didn't do it when I was near enough or that you wouldn't do it in your room, though you do go and put them out there when you're done. You don't smoke in there, do you?"

"I...." Sebastian didn't think about telling her yet again that would devalue his comics if he let the smell of smoke gather in the room. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'll go inside now, and I'll be sure to put this in the ashtray."

He started walking away, hearing her say that annoying nickname she used for him - Sebby, but not whatever she wanted to say after that.


	5. Awkward

When he answered his cell phone, he expected Sam chatting his ear off regarding the fact he'd walked out yet avoided him the next few days, but was in fact still avoiding him.

He'd forgotten he'd been avoiding someone other than just Sam – and Yuki.

" _Hey_."

Sebastian fumbled with the phone, almost dropping it onto the floor. He let out a rather exasperated sound, one which sounded painfully like his voice cracking despite the fact that phase of his life should have been far, far in the past. "I-Ichiro?"

At first, a silence came from the other side, allowing Sebastian's dark eyes to dart around in panic. " _It sounds like I caught you at a bad time._ "

"I – how exactly did you get this number?" Sebastian's eyes opened and closed, one hand reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose, a sudden realization hitting him. "Actually, now that I think of it, how did you get my e-mail?"

" _Yuki._ "

Sebastian swallowed, unsure of what to think about the answer his half-brother gave. His eyes darted towards the programming work on his computer, his fingers resting on the keyboard, ready to start churning out the code once again. When he was trying to work was never a good time to interrupt, yet Ichiro didn't know what his actual schedule was.

" _Look..._ "

The sound of the door opening made Sebastian almost drop the phone from where it rested between his shoulder and his ear. Abigail bounced into the room, her typical good mood making him feel as if he were drowning. Without asking for permission she plopped down onto the couch, kicking her feet up into the air. "So, you're finally talking to Sam?"

"Uh..."

" _Is something going on?_ "

Today was the eleventh of the month, one of two days that Abigail intruded on him during any given month, distracting him from his work as she did so. Unfortunately, she also got up from the couch and pulled the other stool in his room away from his other computer, so she was closer to him, leaning forward slightly while fiddling absentmindedly with the zipper on the front of her shirt.

To say he felt uncomfortable, given the fact... "Look, if you're looking to have sex with me..."

"What?" Abigail stopped staring off into space, her green eyes focused on him while her purple locks of hair cascaded around her shoulders. "Why would I want to do that?"

" _Because you've been pestering me to have sex with you, like, forever._ " The corner of Sebastian's mouth twitched, his mind having had forgotten completely the phone resting between his shoulder and ear let alone the person on the other line.

" _Okay. I really don't want to know about your personal sex life, but if you end up hurting Yuki..._ "

"Hold on. It's not what..."

Abigail grabbed the phone from Sebastian's hand, his breath drawing in tightly. "Hi, Sam! Sebastian was just thinking I was trying to get him to have sex with me again, but I'm not interested in that today. I want to talk to him about the new girl, Yuki. She listened, then pulled the phone away from her ear. "It's not Sam."

"I already knew that." Sebastian felt a slight headache coming on. His cheeks also flared up, his mind mentally finding the situation a major embarrassment – one he didn't want to explain to any of his siblings.

"He says something about checking your e-mail for the address before he hung up."

Sebastian closed his eyes, frustrated with how Abigail interrupted the conversation, even though said conversation wasn't a conversation he didn't necessarily want to currently have, just so she could converse with him...

... regarding Yuki.

He wasn't sure how he felt about that.

"She's pretty amazing, isn't she?"

"Um..."

"Well, I guess you wouldn't know, given the fact you hurried out of there like you did. I'd not expected that. I mean, you're not the most sociable person in the world, but taking off on the new girl I invited. I don't think she felt like she could be a part of our group."

"You think so?" Guilt washed over him; mentally, he wasn't sure how he should react to what Abigail said, particularly when she wasn't trying to get in his personal space, nor was her fidgeting with the front of her shirt – which thankfully unzipped only so far. He didn't understand why she was always so out there in everything she did, beyond the fact she really, really just wanted to piss her father off.

"Well, yeah. Sam was bothered by it as well. Anyway..." Abigail stretched out her hands. "Yuki gives me a lot of quartz. I love it. It's like a dream."

Sebastian stared at her. He knew she wanted him to respond, yet he couldn't. He simply wasn't the kind of person who got personal with people. Not when so often relationships ended up turning into a complete mess.

"So..." Abigail glanced away, changing the topic in order to continue a conversation Sebastian didn't want to have. "Who was that on the phone?" His eyes narrowed, his hand reaching out for the phone still held in her hands. She let out a sigh, plopping it into the palm of her hand. "Look. I get it. You don't what your mom to know you're meeting up with your boyfriend for sex."

"What?"

"That certainly explains why you never wanted to have sex for me. It's a bummer that you swing that way, but I promise to be supportive."

Sebastian's teeth ground together, pulling his hand back along with the phone. "Get out."

"What?"

"I said get out!"

She stood up, knocking over the stool. "You don't have to be so... so... such an ass hole!" She turned, leaving the room in a flurry, but not before saying, "See if I put in a good word for you with Yuki!"


	6. Confusion

"So..."

Sebastian recognized the tone of voice Sam used and looked up at his friend. Sam glanced away from where he sat on one of the stools in Sebastian's room, rubbing the back of his neck. His best friend finally got fed up with Sebastian avoiding meeting up like they normally did and took the time to come up the mountain path; he proceeded in waiting until Sebastian obviously finished whatever he was doing before speaking up.

"Yes?"

"That was honestly a rather awkward moment. Back when you stormed out of the saloon I mean. I'm not sure what to think of it, to be honest."

"Sorry."

"I'm not sure I'm the one you should be apologizing to. Abigail took the trouble of inviting the new girl to come, but Yuki's not bad."

"I know."

"How can you possibly know, when you've not actually met Yuki?"

"That's because..."

Sam instinctively held up a hand. "I really don't want to know, you know. I mean, what you're going to say." Sebastian felt a bit disappointed. "I mean, there is only so much you can learn about someone from other people, Seb. You've got to get to know them yourself before making a judgment. I get that's a difficult thing for you, but I really worry that it might be..."

"Might be?" Sebastian titled his head slightly. It was rare for Sam to have a major thought, yet when he did, it tended to be rather poignant. Said thoughts didn't surprise him, given the fact Sam was an extrovert, the exact opposite of himself.

"Just, I don't want you to miss out on an opportunity, you know?"

"It's not as if she's going anywhere, or do you actually believe she won't be able to run the farm like she wants?"

"That..." Sam's mouth twisted. "Sebastian, do you know what's going on between Abigail and Yuki?"

"Their becoming friends. It's a bit odd, but that's the way it is." Sebastian watched Sam sighed and decided it was time to change the subject. "Do you want to play a video game?"

"Sure." Sam still seemed bothered by something, but the subject was closed, meaning Sebastian wouldn't get an earful of Sam trying to explain whatever social _thing_ he'd not gotten, which never seemed to turn out well, given the fact Sam's explanations more often than not just ended up confusing Sam. His best friend didn't bring the subject up again when he left either, yet Sam bringing up Abigail and Yuki wasn't the only oddity that day. He took a break, heading upstairs to get some sodas and snacks from the kitchen for him and Sam when he ran into his sister.

As per usual, her dark facial features twisting in a frown – her typical, if not only expression when they interacted with each other. "You're an idiot, you know."

The corners of Sebastian's mouth tightened slightly. "I don't need you to rub in the fact you're the genius between us, Maru."

"That's not what I meant. I meant when it comes to Abigail." She was leaning up against the wall, watching her carefully.

Sebastian turned, looking his sister in the eye. "Look, I don't think that is any of your business."

"Yeah, well, everyone in Stardew knows how you stormed out of the saloon when she invited Yuki to socialize with you guys. Hearing you did that – that was embarrassing."

"And?"

"Look. I get it. You're indifferent about everything, but that's going to just come back and bite you in the butt later on." Maru pushed herself away from the wall, leaving Sebastian even more confused than he already was after speaking with Sam.


	7. Egged On

He hated eggs.

He hated eggs and yet Stardew Valley had an entire festival dedicated to eggs. The entire festival was dedicated to one thing – eggs. In fact, the only food available for consumption at the festival was in fact eggs – the very thought of which made his stomach churn, his teeth grit together at the thought of dealing with an unpleasant allergic reaction to eating raw or lightly cooked egg.

Still, his mother never let him miss out on any of the festival activities, telling him he didn't need to keep himself cooped up, that instead, he needed some fresh air. She pushed more this year, given the fact Yuki was back in town, not to mention he'd somehow managed to avoid her ever since she'd arrived, although it was just Spring. He wasn't sure he was purposefully avoiding her anymore, given the fact he'd returned to his normal schedule.

He'd not gone out of his way to speak with her though.

The very idea made him nervous.

" _What do you mean? Don't you like Yuki?_ "

There was no escaping the fact he was indeed interested in his childhood friend. Somehow his younger half-brother and his mother – they both knew he was interested in her, yet he didn't know how to approach, what to say, even with what felt like a somewhat normal conversation the other day. Not to mention the fact the day before he'd stormed out like a complete idiot, making a fool of himself in front of her. He was lucky it went that well.

"It must be weird for you." The sound of her voice made him pause, a cigarette between his fingers. He glanced up, one hand rubbing the back of his head. "I mean, the fact there is an entire festival dedicated to your allergy."

He reached up, rubbing the back of his head. "The rotten egg toss was fun. Mayor Lewis canned it though."

"Oh. I missed out on that. It wasn't here when I visited my grandfather."

Sebastian closed his eyes, a slight blush spreading across his cheeks, the memory of a past egg festival where he'd vomited in front of her, making her comment about the whole thing being weird a bit odd – it was something she already knew, almost as if she were trying to make small talk with him, he glanced down at the ground, unsure of what he should say. The cigarette hung between his fingers, his mouth pushed together when a familiar, chipper voice broke the silence.

"Yuki!" The sound of Abigail's voice made Sebastian tense up, his eyes moving up so he could look at the girl who dyed her hair purple – who insisted that she didn't dye said hair, that purple was her natural hair color. He felt an eye twitch, watching Abigail jump onto Yuki, hugging her from behind. In the back of his mind, he found himself rather glad that Abigail never tried something like that with him – the thought of being touched in such a manner sending shivers down his spine.

A hand-clapping on the middle of his back made his head turn, his eyes looking now at his best friend – yet in some ways that title felt a bit off given the fact he'd had the same level of friendship with Yuki once, yet it never became awkward between him and Sam – well, except for the fact he couldn't say anything about knowing her, that he liked her, not without feeling completely awkward. It was one of those subjects he never felt comfortable talking to Sam with, or Sam bringing up.

"Good to see you're here, and not avoiding everyone."

Sebastian took a deep breath, sucking in the smoke from the cigarette he was using to make attending the festival easier. In the back of his mind, he'd noticed Yuki never said anything regarding the fact he was smoking, the bad habit which controlled the anxiety he felt. He listened to Abigail chat away regarding the egg hunt the younger ones participated in every year, the _thing_ he finally got his mother to quit getting him to join in on.

"I... sure. I was planning on joining. Sounds like a lot of fun." He watched Abigail drag Yuki off by the hand over towards Mayor Lewis, where the others were gathering, including Sam's younger brother Vincent and Vincent's friend who Sebastian didn't know the name of. Sebastian let out another puff of smoke, not thinking much about what just happened, his mouth twisting into a tight, thin line.

"So..."

"Something tells me you're going to say something stupid." Sebastian let out a sigh, his eyes narrowing, knowing full well the "so" often led into a rather awkward conversation between him and Sam. Of course, perhaps saying something stupid wasn't always accurate, and neither was, "Or you're going to do something stupid."

"Well..."

"What is it?"

"You should make your move. You know, before it is too late. Before you regret not doing something."

Sebastian's mouth twisted slightly. "I don't follow."

"Ask her out."

Sebastian turned his head, slightly confused given the fact Sam didn't know how he felt regarding Yuki, yet the advice...

"I don't know how to put this, but I think if you don't, you'll end up regretting it."

"You know, I honestly don't know what you're talking about."

"Yeah, I was afraid of that. You're so oblivious, it's painful, you know."

"Well, apparently you're not completely oblivious." Sebastian flicked the cigarette. In the back of his mind, he wondered how Sam figured out, but then – it was rather odd how he'd walked out on everyone at the saloon. " _Were my feelings that transparent?_ "


	8. Jilted Flower

He hated the Flower Dance.

Robin, of course, insisted he go, just like she insisted he get out of the house and go to all of the local festivals, yet he felt like a complete, utter idiot when he wore the monkey suit. The pieced suit was a blue color, a color he'd abandoned for the color of black a long time ago, the bright colors really not feeling how he felt regarding the turbulent life around him.

And right now, he was stuck in the said monkey suit, looking at himself in the mirror, adjusting the tie, contemplating what Sam said about waiting until it was too late. He'd thought about this for days, struggling with his own self-doubt along with his personal feelings for his childhood friend. He took a deep breath, tugging at the tie before the door swung open.

"Maru!"

"You're the one who didn't lock the door, but we should get going."

She stood there, the white dress a stark contrast against his skin, her red hair cascading around her face. His eye twitched, remembering how she always danced with the local doctor, something which honestly bothered him, yet he didn't know how to act like an older brother to his younger sister. Hell, he didn't know how to act like an older brother to any of his siblings, if he really thought about it.

Of course, he also found himself always dancing with Abigail. They were the outsiders in town, so everyone expected as much. Everyone else was paired off, yet there was some consolation in the fact Abigail found the experience just as embarrassing as he did, although he always felt uncomfortable with the way she came into his room without asking, let alone the times she tried instigating sexual relations.

Some days, he felt like a major idiot for _still_ being a virgin, but in the back of his head, remembering how he blurted out the fact she pestered him over the phone while Ichiro was listening when he'd honestly thought he'd simply thought those words. He remembered his younger half-brother's response – that he shouldn't hurt Yuki. Taking a deep breath, he knew he was an idiot.

" _Ask Yuki if she'll dance with you,_ " one voice said in the back of his head while the other said, " _are you crazy? There is no way she'll agree to dance with you? Didn't she say something about things not going back to the way they were? That we were strangers now?_ " Yet, there was no denying the fact he wanted something more, let alone the way he felt. " _Crap._ "

"Seriously! Hurry up, Sebastian!"

He let out a sigh, following after her. Robin saw him, and she reached out, pinching his cheeks. "You look so adorable. Maybe you'll have some luck?"

He couldn't help but give her an exasperated look, wishing she wouldn't but into his life so much. Taking a deep breath, he headed towards the place the festival was held, swallowing his nervousness, having made up his mind, even though going through with it felt like a major impossibility. He found himself looking around for Yuki, swallowing nervously, working up the courage to ask her to be his dance partner, the idea of actually asking someone instead of going with what was expected for the dance caused a slight pressure to build up right behind his ears.

He saw her, looking around nervously. She wasn't in a white dress like the other girls, having come recently and instead stood in her farmer clothes, making him feel a little more self-conscious regarding the situation. His hand fiddled with the tie again, while he cleared his throat. A flash of purple made his eyes blink, his dark eyes watching Abigail hurry over towards Yuki.

His jaw dropped.

While he couldn't hear what was being said, he knew what was going on. He found himself freezing, watching the two talk before Abigail grabbed onto Yuki's hand, dragging her off towards the place everyone danced while Yuki's mouth opened as if she were trying to say something. His eyes widened his throat swallowing, realizing what was going on. He felt a hand clap down on his shoulder and heard a sigh come from Sam.

"Sucks to be you."

Sebastian's eyes blinked.

"I did warn you that you should make your move and ask Abigail out sooner."

"A..." Sebastian's eyes blinked, his eyes closing tightly.

"Um..."

"Go ahead. No need to..." Sebastian took a deep breath, wanting to say he was fine, yet he knew he wasn't fine. He opened his eyes, watching Sam take off, swallowing. His eyes darted around, looking around at everyone. Maru was dancing with the doctor, which bothered him, but he caught sight of his mother, who had that worried look on her face. He shook his head, turning and leaving the place, not wanting to stick around.

He couldn't.

He didn't know how he got back to the house, everything was a blur, yet he found himself standing against the door downstairs, the tie around his neck lose while the top buttons were undone. He swallowed, frustrated with how he felt. His eyes turned up towards the ceiling, the fact he was definitely jilted by his crush even before he got the chance to confess. He took a deep breath. "Shit."


	9. Wilted Flower

" _What am I going to do?_ "

The thought rattled around in his brain, his hands reaching up for the already loose tie, tugging at the knot in an attempt to further loosen the offending piece of clothing. He felt as if the tie was cutting off his air when in reality his breath came in a slightly rigid manner as he attempted keeping the emotions that threatened to boil over inside.

" _What am I going to do? What the hell am I going to do!_ "

He'd not felt this much emotion in a very long time, but loosening the tie somewhat helped him feel a little freer. His fingers fidgeted with the suit jacket and buttons of the dress shirt until he felt a bit of air touching his bare chest, allowing him to breathe easier. He plopped down into his computer chair, staring at the ceiling, struggling in the back of his mind regarding how he felt.

" _I feel like crying. I've not felt this way in years._ " He took a deep breath, his nostrils burning slightly, pressure building up around his eyes and in his chest again. " _I feel like an idiot."_ One of his hands reached up so he might cover his eyes, while he attempted controlling his breath. " _I don't know what I'm the bigger idiot for – thinking things could have proceeded to a romantic relationship when we weren't even yet back to where we were when we last see each other, or I didn't see THAT coming._ "

He took another breath, his entire body shaking, before he headed upstairs to the kitchen, unable to sit still. His mind raised with emotion, horrible emotions he felt guilty for and wanted to go away, yet he had no control. Somehow, he found himself in front of the refrigerator, still tugging at some of the buttons on the dress shirt as it was only partially unbuttoned, but fidgeting with the buttons with one hand felt calming for some strange reason.

He stood there for who knows how long, working at the one button with one hand while the other held onto the handle of the refrigerator door tightly when the front door opened. He swallowed, freezing, unable to move despite the fact he didn't want to see his family right now. In particular, he didn't want to see the look on his mother's face; after all, he ran away, but she seemed interested in his relationship with Yuki.

He heard footsteps from behind, his dar eyes drifting towards the ground. He swallowed, his free hand reaching up to rub the back of his neck, not wanting to the look the person in the eye. "Really?"

His hand stopped rubbing his neck. He slowly turned, looking his sister in the eye, swallowing. "Maru. Um..." He let his dark eyes drift away so he wouldn't have to look her in the eye. "Where's mom and dad."

There was a silence, one which honestly bothered him, making him lookup. He flinched, his stomach churning, feeling as if he would throw up upon seeing the livid look on Maru's face. One of his feet shifted back ever so slightly, yet she seemingly responded to this, moving forward. "What..." She took another step forward, moving faster. "... did you say?" She walked right up, using her finger to poke him painfully in the chest, his eyes drifting down while his mind registered his state of undress. Which honestly embarrassed him even though he knew the slightly unbuttoned dress shirt wouldn't bother most guys. He glanced up, confused. "You have the _gall_ to call him father after refusing to do so for so long? How dare you, Sebastian, after you took off like you did!"

"I..." Sebastian's eyes widened. He _had_ called Demetrius "dad" right then, something he definitely hadn't done in a long time, not since he'd stopped feeling like a part of the family, though he didn't remember when that was. There was almost a solace in calling Demetrius _that_ , yet whatever solace he gained quickly left because of Maru's ire.

"Don't! Seriously get over yourself!" She poked him in the chest again but made him step backward. He now somehow found himself leaning against the sink, going backward slightly. "The fact Abigail decided to move onto some strange girl is nobodies fault but your own for not stepping up and being a man by asking her out."

"That..." His mind spun, his confusion growing. In particular, he _knew_ he didn't have feelings for Abigail, yet wasn't sure why Sam and Maru both came to that conclusion. Yet – he didn't feel Mary was wrong, about him not being man enough. He'd felt like a coward long before he'd left for the Flower Festival. No, he'd been a coward from the day Yuki let him know she'd be moving to town.

"Don't _that_ me! You're so aloof, so unaware of what is going on around you..."

Sebastian's eyes narrowed, his own anger flaring, her words triggering something. "Don't you _dare_ talk to me about not knowing what is going on around you when you've not noticed that our local doctor has a thing for you!"

He'd not expected Maru to react by slapping him, tears welling in her eyes. "You're an idiot Sebastian! I want nothing to do with you! You want to get away from here so much, why don't you just leave! You're not wanted, but Yuki and Abigail getting together should tell you that! And don't you dare talk about Doctor Harvey like that again, like he's got some kind of weird intentions! You jerk!"

He opened his mouth, one hand touching his stinging cheek, unsure of how to react while Maru took off. He felt numb, yet registered the sound of the door to her bedroom slamming shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note - Sebastian is right in Maru not noticing some of Harvey's behaviors around her. Maru on the other hand is right about Harvey not having any kind of weird intentions towards her. This is actually a plot point later on - after the 8k mark.


	10. Running

His hands wouldn't stop shaking, nor would the numb feeling go away. His emotions were a tangled mess, something he found himself incapable of untangling in the given moment. The feeling of being jilted by his childhood crush yet again was complicated by other feelings, such as the confusion regarding why Sam and Maru thought he was interested in Abigail, let alone the feelings created by his perceived failings regarding his family's expectations.

Somehow, he got down the stairs without anyone noticing, possibly because Maru holed herself up into her room, but also because his mother and Demetrius hadn't yet returned. After a few moments, he realized his hand still touched the cheek Maru slapped. While he never remembered getting along with Maru, this was definitely the first time he remembered things becoming physical.

" _You want to get away from here so much, why don't you just leave! You're not wanted, but Yuki and Abigail getting together should tell you that!_ "

She'd said what he'd long felt.

He reacted, pulling off the dreaded suit and tossing it onto the black couch in his basement room in favor of his normal clothing, packing what belongings he could – including his laptop – into a bag. He felt like he needed to leave, yet the sickening feeling from not having anywhere else to go hit his stomach hard, making his hands shake even more. In fact, he'd avoided making this move knowing full well he'd end up homeless and on the streets.

" _Hope you'll visit..._ "

Hesitantly, he logged onto his PC, retrieving the address from his PC, making himself a map to follow. He felt like vomiting, not feeling as if he'd be wanted there either, yet he couldn't shake the desperation he felt, the panic and anxiety which wouldn't go away. Strangely enough, he did remember a few times where things got to the physical level between him and Itachi, yet for some reason _that_ seemed better than _this_.

In fact, he remembered how much these altercations upset his father, who simply wanted them to get along. " _I heard you got into another altercation with Itachi. – Are you even listening to me? I want to know why? – I don't understand what's gotten into the two of you._ "

" _Calm down. It's not unusual for siblings, particularly brothers to have a few physical altercations growing up. I mean, you and I turned out alright, so they'll be fine._ " His uncle's words – Sebastian hadn't believed them at the time, yet even now he struggled with believing _that_ despite for some reason thinking _that_ was better than _this._

His hands reached for the keys to his motorcycle and he headed up the stairs. He glanced around, almost as if making sure his mother and stepfather weren't around, before turning towards the kitchen so he might enter the garage. A light filtered from under the doorway of Maru's room, making him swallow.

" _Don't leave without saying you're sorry, without saying what you need to say._ " He swallowed again, walking over to the door, raising his fist to the door, only to hesitate. The memory of Maru slapping him made him stop. His eyes drifted to the ground and he found himself walking towards the kitchen, gripping the pad of paper, taking a deep breath.

_Maru_

_I'm sorry. I crossed the line tonight. Demetrius isn't my father. He never was. I don't know Harvey like you, so I guess my worries are unjustified. I wish I knew how to be a better brother to you, but I don't. I got the message and will leave you alone_

_Sebastian_

He walked back without hesitation, sliding the folded note under her door before heading towards the garage. He took only a few steps when he heard the note slide back under, which in turn made him turn his head to look back at her door, swallowing. He lifted one hand up, wanting to push the note back under, but then decided he'd best not aggravate the situation.

Opening up the garage door revealed a slight drizzle with a chance of becoming worse, yet he kicked up the motor on the motorcycle. " _You've got to get away like you usually do._ "

Except, this wasn't like it usually was, given the fact in the back of his mind he definitely didn't feel like he would return like he usually did. He didn't feel like he could.

A light drizzle fell outside of the garage door, the weather threatening to become worse, yet he left. He found himself going down the road, the sound of the motor and wheels on wet asphalt hummed in his ears, while bright lights every so often pierced the darkness. The rain – _it_ started pouring down, his map blurring, making it difficult once he finally arrived in Jojo.

He pulled over, reaching into his bag for his phone, calling the number Itachi called from. His panic rose while he waited for Itachi to answer, his mind waiting for yet another rejection after so many that day.


	11. Freezing

He remembered fearing Itachi wouldn't answer the phone, his entire body numb as his mind was mentally from the cold rain falling down. Hearing his brother's voice – he felt some kind of relief rushing through his body. He looked down at the blurred map, his eyes hazily taking in the street names at the corner he was at. The rain continued pouring down, but he muttered the names of those streets, although he wasn't sure he was right.

" _Wait. Are you saying you're right outside of my apartment?_ "

"Possibly."

" _I'm coming to the front door. Please. Follow my instructions carefully._ "

Itachi gave him careful instructions which included looking around for specific landmarks. He didn't have far to walk, leaving his motorcycle parked where he first called his younger brother, his mind still unsure of whether he was doing the right thing or not. He didn't have to go far, but found himself looking right at the front door of one apartment building, in particular, wondering what he should do next.

" _I'll be right there._ "

His eyes blinked, watching the door open up. He saw Itachi standing there, older obviously than what he last remembered. He waved his hand, motioning for Sebastian to step into the entrance. When he did, he felt Itachi motion for him to follow, leading him towards the elevator, Neither one of them said anything, the entire situation feeling majorly awkward, not to mention...

Itachi was being nice, which felt strange.

Very strange.

The arrived at a specific floor and he found himself glancing around while Itachi stepped off. His younger brother stopped, looking back at him, giving him a rather strange look, before motioning again for him to follow. They arrived in front of a door Itachi opened, stepping inside and removing his shoes. Sebastian followed suit, stopping down so he might remove his boots when he found himself hit by a dizzy spell.

Briefly, he heard Itachi call out to him, everything blurring as he sat down on the step inside of the apartment, attempting to regain his bearings, the keys to his motorcycle and his phone dropping onto the ground next to him. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Itachi stoop down, picking up the keys, tucking them into his pocket. He looked at Sebastian's boots, frowning as he did so.

"You're not going to take off your shoes?"

"Not staying."

"Yeah. You are." Itachi watched Sebastian as if waiting for him to move. "Take off those boots of yours."

Sebastian responded by reaching out to untie the laces on his boots, only to find himself struggling with grasping onto the laces. In the back of his mind, he kept telling himself this was because he was hesitant in making himself welcome in a place he wasn't actually welcome, and not because his fingers were too cold to properly grasp the shoelaces. Itachi finally let out a curse, untying the shoelaces, tugging the boots off and setting them next to his own shoes.

Except, Itachi slipped his shoes back on. "Look. I'll be right back. You'd better make yourself comfortable by the time I get back." He poked Sebastian in the head. "Got it?"

"Yes." The door to the apartment opened and closed, leaving Sebastian sitting there. After a small amount of time, he stood up, heading out of the entrance area of Itachi's apartment, taking in everything. In the back of his mind, he knew his younger brother's apartment was likely outside anything he could personally afford, which in turn made the guilt building in the back of his mind for coming.

" _You're not wanted._ "

After all, he was the major loser who never finished college like everyone expected, not to mention he struggled with finding work as a freelance computer programmer who was self-taught. He sat down on the couch in the main area of Itachi's apartment, contemplating how much of a leech off everyone in his life was, or so he thought. His entire body felt as numb as his mind, his head dropping down when he heard the front door open.

He heard Itachi step into his own apartment, setting the keys for his motorcycle down onto the kitchen counter a few minutes later. "So, I hope you don't mind, but I relocated your motorcycle into the parking garage for the apartment. That way it's out of the rain but doesn't risk getting stolen. Honestly, you're the last person I'd ever expect to have a motorcycle."

Sebastian didn't respond, his head remaining low in his hands while he attempted contemplating what he should say or do yet found himself feeling just as lost as when he left Stardew.

"I see my couch has gotten majorly soaked while I was gone."

"Sorry."

"That..." Itachi let out a sigh. "I wasn't looking for an apology, Yuishoru."

"Sebastian."

"We'll discuss that later."

"Sorry."

"I told you. I wasn't looking for an apology. Actually, I should be the one to apologize for making you feel like you need to apologize."

"Why?"

"Why?" Itachi took a deep breath. "Look. I'm concerned that you're sitting there soaking wet, not to mention freezing to death, meaning we need to get you out of those clothes."

Sebastian found himself staring at Itachi, his mind confused.

"I get it. You don't have any dry clothes to change into, but I can take care of that. We need to get you out of those wet cloths, but I need to call the family doctor."

"No." Sebastian swallowed. Contacting the family doctor meant their father finding out he was there, yet he'd not talked with the man in a long time.

"You have hypothermia."

"No." He wasn't shivering, after all.

"Yes, you do."

"Not cold. Not shivering." Sebastian flinched as Itachi reached out and touched his cheek with the back of his hand.

"Yeah. You're freezing. And are shivering despite the fact you don't think you are. I'm calling..."

"Please. Don't." One of Sebastian's hands reached out for Itachi's sleeve. He watched his brother look down, surprised regarding his actions. He then looked Sebastian in the eye, hesitating as he did so.

"Why? Why do you want me to not call?"

"Dad."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note - The names Sebastian and Yuishoru are from different languages, but mean the same thing. Most Japanese people also don't have middle names.


	12. Fading Out

"What?" Itachi stared at him, making Sebastian regret saying what he did, yet his fingers clumsily held onto the sleeve of his younger brother's shirt. His eyes looked down at the ground, while he attempted controlling his breath. "You don't want dad to find out?"

"No." Sebastian cleared his throat yet found himself struggling to articulate the fact he didn't want their father to know that he was there, so he pointed a finger towards the ground, one hand still clutching onto Itachi's sleeve. "Please."

"Are you saying you don't want dad to know you're here?"

"Yes." He felt tired, ashamed and very disorientated.

"You know, he misses you."

"Please. Please Itachi." Sebastian felt Itachi pull his arm away, dislodging his sleeve from Sebastian's clumsy grip.

"Okay. We'll talk about that later, but if you end up in the hospital, I'm calling dad. As such, you'll at least let me call the family doctor he arranged for me while I'm here."

"Why?"

"Because I don't know what to do, beyond getting you out of those wet clothes of yours, but I don't want to tell dad I'm the reason you ended up in the hospital for hypothermia. I'd rather it be for your own stupidity."

Sebastian swallowed, the words definitely stinging. He swallowed again, trying to ease the way he felt.

Itachi noticed. "Wait. I'm not trying to say you're stupid, but you did do something very stupid."

" _I left before it started raining, right? I can't remember. I certainly feel stupid._ "

"Anyways, I'm going to call the doctor now. Don't fall asleep." Itachi stepped away, walking over to the kitchen counter. Sebastian's eyes drifted, his head turning slightly so he might watch his brother carefully, unsure of how to react, let alone whether he could trust him.

" _After all. Maru..._ "

Itachi dialed a number on his cellphone, placing it to his ear. He waited and then said. "No, I'm actually alright. I am wondering what you do if someone has hypothermia. Do you make them take a shower to warm up?" He watched his brother pause, flinching, almost as if the person on the other end was chewing him out. "Okay. Okay. I'll let you in when you get here. No, I'm not telling you who the patient is, not unless they _have_ to go to the hospital."

Sebastian's eyes blinked, his mind confused regarding why Itachi was actually taking steps to prevent their father from finding out he was there, considering the fact he didn't remember a time when he and Itachi ever got along. His head turned, looking at the floor, sucking on his lip, sitting there continuing to make Itachi's sofa soaking wet, meaning he was definitely a burden. As such, he stood up, planning to leave, not thinking things through.

"Hold on. Where do you think you're going?"

"Leaving."

He heard Itachi reach for a pair of keys and stick them in his pocket. "Not when I've the keys to your motorcycle. Plus, your motorcycle is not parked where it was. I moved it into the apartment parking garage and I'm not telling you where it is." Hearing this made him glare at Itachi. "Yeah. Glare all you want. Sit."

"Your sofa."

Itachi turned his head, looking at the wet spot on the couch. "Don't worry about it."

"But..."

"I'm worried about you. We need to get you out of those wet clothes so you can start warming up."

"Oh."

His mind didn't register what Itachi was telling him. He watched Itachi move over to his side, but his mind vaguely registered his younger brother's hand reaching out, tugging on his sleeve, guiding him into what he guessed was Itachi's own bedroom. The place was a stark difference from his basement bedroom., yet his mind still didn't comprehend what was going on.

Not until he felt Itachi tug at the bottom of his black sweat jacket and shit, making him startle, panicking, pulling away, pushing Itachi's hand away.

"Calm down!" Itachi stood there in front of him, his hands up in the air. "Do you think you can remove your clothes on your own? You were struggling with your boots, remember?" Sebastian contemplated what Itachi said yet couldn't answer. "Please. You don't want to end up in the hospital, so let me help you." Itachi glanced at the door.

Sebastian sucked in his breath, his mind contemplating what Itachi said, yet when his brother reached out for the bottom of his jacket and shirt, he didn't react like he did before. He felt the clothing pulling up over his head, resulting in him briefly not seeing anything. His eyes closed, feeling awkward, standing there partially naked. He heard the clothes plop onto the ground with a squelching sound.

He heard a knocking sound at the door but heard Itachi's voice. "Hold on. That should be the doctor."

He watched Itachi walk away, his eyes focusing on the doorway. He could hear Itachi speaking to someone, yet for some reason his body moved, in a slightly awkward manner to the door, his eyes blinking. "Itachi."

He saw Itachi turn but saw the person with him. His eyes blinked; his mind confused regarding why Itachi would invite them over. His brother turned. "They're the doctor."

"Oh."

The doctor looked at him, which made him look away, his mind not registering the reason why. He watched the person lean over, speaking to Itachi so he couldn't hear what they were saying. Itachi turned away, heading into another room, before coming back with a couple of towels. He looked Sebastian in the eye. "Come on. Back into my room. We still need to get you out of those wet clothes and into something dry.."

Sebastian's mouth opened, wanting to say he didn't have any dry clothes.

"I'm going to lend you some of mine."

"But..."

"It's okay. We're around the same size, but what's important is making sure you're taken care of." Itachi set the towels on the bed before looking Sebastian in the eye. "We _need_ to get the rest of your wet clothes off." Sebastian didn't respond. "That means I'm going to be touching you again. Do you understand?"

Sebatian nodded his head, not paying what was going on any mind, He eventually found himself sitting on the edge of Itachi's bed, the sheets pulled back, dressed in clothes which were definitely not his, when the doctor walked in. He looked at them, then blurted out, "She's female."

"You just realized that?"

"Yes."

Itachi sighed. "You're really out of it."

"Sorry."

The doctor placed a hot drink onto the side table before sticking a thermometer into his mouth. After a bit of time, she removed the thermometer. "Well, you don't have to go to the hospital, but it's a good thing Itachi called me. Who is he?"

"Yeah, I'd rather not say."

"Your father doesn't pay me..."

"He's my older brother, but don't tell him he's here. They've not talked in awhile."

"Seriously?" The doctor shook his head, handing Sebastian something to drink. He took the drink, his hands struggling to hold it, yet he took in the warm liquid. "Slowly."

"It's sweet."

"Still, drink it."

Reluctantly he did, but he soon found himself lying down on Itachi's bed, the blankets tucked in around him tightly, yet he found himself finally drifting off to sleep like he wanted. He also realized finally that, yes, he was cold.


	13. Being Burdensome

Awareness came in waves, typically when Itachi nudged him away, plying him with more of the warm, sweet drink which he eventually recognized as a warm hot chocolate, yet he remained rather unaware of the things going on around him, sleeping a good chunk of the time, his body temperature slowly rising, his mind becoming less confused regarding what was going on.

In fact, the first thing he became truly aware of was the fact someone else was in the bed next to him, their own body warming his own, when he bolted upright, panicking. The person next to him moved slightly, making him move towards the edge of the bed. He felt himself teeter, tipping towards the ground, letting out a yelp as he fell, landing hard on his backside.

He heard the person let out a groan, before shifting towards his side of the bed. A familiar face appeared looking down at him. "Are you alright?"

"Itachi..." His eyes blinked, confusion setting in while he tried remembering how he came to be in his current situation.

"What?"

"Why are we..." Sebastian closed his eyes, letting out a sigh, wondering if he really wanted to know the answer.

"You had hypothermia, remember?" Itachi's feet lowered to the ground near Sebastian. "I stayed near you to help raise your body temperature while you slept, though I think the warm drinks helped."

"Sorry."

"Don't be."

"I'll move to the couch." Sebastian let out a sigh. " _If you'll still have me._ "

"Nonsense. We slept together when we were younger, so it's really not that big of a deal."

He contemplated what Itachi said, then said. "I don't remember that."

"You don't..." Itachi stood up, heading into the other room, pausing in the doorway. "Come on. Let's get some food into you."

Sebastian pushed himself up off the ground, swallowing back his frustration at feeling like a definite burden. Standing up straight, he looked at the bed, before straightening out the side of the bed he slept on, not wanting to be a bad guest. He then started into the main living area, swallowing as he did so, his eyes glued towards the ground. He wasn't sure what to say, but then finally decided on, "I'm really sorry for causing you trouble."

The silence made him look up which in turn made him look Itachi in the eye who was at the kitchen counter. Sebastian's eyes drifted towards where his laptop stood, forming a v-shape, making him swallow back panic, brushing aside the puzzled look on Itachi's face. His attention drifted back to his brother when Itachi spoke. "Family isn't trouble."

"Yeah, but..."

"Stop acting like you are." Itachi's head turned towards Sebastian's computer. "I set your laptop up to dry, but I hope it still works. I remember...." There came a pause. "I remember you'd freak out if you couldn't do your nerdy tech stuff growing up. Your phone's packed in rice drying, but the clothes you were wearing are now washed and with the other clothes in your bag in the dryer. I figured you'd want to fold them yourself."

"I..." Sebastian glanced way. "Thanks. Thanks for everything."

"Sit on the couch while I make you something to eat."

"You don't..."

"You're my brother, but I do care. That said, I get why you're wary."

"What do you mean" Sebastian swallowed.

"I was a major brat growing up." Itachi let out a sigh, heading over to the rice cooker so he might get the device started up. "And sit down already! The couch isn't wet anymore."

"Yeah, well I wasn't much better." Reluctantly, Sebastian sat down on the couch.

"You?" The tone in Itachi's voice sounded like he was surprised.

"Yeah, me."

"Why would you think that? You're not the one who started things. You were just – easy to provoke."

"Whatever." Sebastian worried his bottom lip, thinking of his relationship with Mary where he was quite sure he started everything, yet he also thought the same thing applied to him and Itachi.

"You're not acting like yourself."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I should say you're acting differently then I remember. I mean, I'd never expected you to ride a motorcycle, yet your clothing is all dark. Your mood's also dark."

Sebastian looked up at the ceiling. "Wasn't I always like this?"

"No. You used to be a lot more cheerful, though to be honest, I think that started changing towards when you stopped coming to stay with us every few months. You also used to wear bright colors, but you used to be obnoxiously touchy-feely, which drove me up the wall, and honestly was why I kept pushing your buttons. You were weird, but this not wanting to be touched is a different kind of weird."

"Honestly, I don't remember ever being that way."

"So..." Itachi cleared his throat. "How did things go with Yuki?" His mouth twisted, his eyes closing, letting out a groan upon hearing his brother say her name. He didn't want to think about the Flower Dance, yet now he felt like an idiot for even trying, never noticing. "I told you, messing around would mess up your chances with Yuki, and what happened to you?"

"Yeah, I know. I know."

"You mean you really did have sex with that girl, whoever it was that I was speaking with., who grabbed the phone from you"

Sebastian's eyes blinked, but his head tilted up, although he felt a bit dizzy. "Hell no. Why is it everyone thinks there is something going on between me and Abigail?"

"Then how do you explain what I heard on the phone? You were talking about having sex with the girl."

He felt his cheeks heat up slightly, but his voice cracked. "Seriously? Abigail weirds..." His mouth snapped shut. "I didn't just say that out loud."

"Yeah, you did. But then you wouldn't be you." Itachi took a deep breath. "Wait. If you weren't having sex with another girl, then what happened between you and Yuki."

Sebastian glared at Itachi, or at least he thought it was a glare.

"From the look of horror on your face, I take it you don't want to talk about what happened but isn't that why you're here."

"It's..." Sebastian swallowed. "Only part of the reason. And, what happened is I was an idiot and waited too long."

He heard Itachi let out a sound of frustration. "Are you sure you're not misreading the situation again?"

"I don't want to think about it. It's making my head hurt."

"Why don't you lie down for a bit until I finish what I'm making you. I'm fine with you using the bedroom, but..."

Sebastian let out a sigh, choosing to lie down on the couch while tucking his hands behind his neck while lying on one side so that one of his arms would provide a pillow. He closed his eyes, trying not to think of anything in general.


	14. Reaction

Despite trying not to think of anything in general, the negative thoughts wouldn't stop coming. In the back of his mind, he still remembered how he felt seeing Abigail speaking with Yuki at the Flower Dance, asking her to dance before he did. He felt like an idiot for having wanted to ask her, given the fact the Flower Dance really wasn't his thing, yet his interaction with Maru telling him he wasn't wanted honestly didn't help the dark mood he was in.

He also felt guilty for basically freeloading at Itachi's place even though he'd only been there a short time. He'd like to say said short time was less than a day, yet he didn't know how long he slept through the hypothermia. In fact, he felt like an idiot for leaving while there was still a drizzle, yet the feeling he couldn't stay any longer hung over his head along with the fact he didn't feel like he had anywhere else to go.

This, in turn, made him feel sick, yet he found himself lying there with an arm over his eyes wishing he might remain in the dark not facing his problems.

"Hey."

He swallowed upon hearing his brother's voice, yet didn't respond.

"Hey." Itachi nudged him. "You need to eat something."

"Not hungry." Sebastian pulled the arms tighter over his eyes. He definitely didn't feel hungry. If anything, he simply wanted to sleep. His head also still slightly hurt, yet he didn't feel nauseated, simply not hungry.

"While I get the fact your head likely still hurts, the only thing you've had since last night was the hot chocolate we used to warm you up."

" _We..._ " Sebastian's mind drifted slightly, remembering the doctor who showed up. He slowly sat up, slightly curious despite the fact his head spun. He found himself staring at the bowl of food Itachi held out for him. His eyes opened and closed, taking in the bowl of rice. There was a yellow color to the rice, which seemed a bit odd, yet he took the chopsticks – rather reluctantly. Taking a deep breath, he took a bite of the food.

He swallowed the food, contemplating the taste. Itachi stood up straight. "Not bad."

"It doesn't taste bad."

He took a few more bites, feeling as if the taste was somehow familiar, sending warning bells off in his mind. His eyes remained glued to the floor and Itachi's feet, his mind focusing in on how he'd managed yet again to be a burden to his younger brother, ignoring the warning bell which went off in his head, continuing to eat, until his tongue started itching, which made him lower the bowl, his stomach churning unpleasantly.

"Something the matter?" Itachi's voice didn't draw his head up. "You need..."

Sebastian's stomach lurched. He stood up, shoving the bowl into Itachi's hands before hurrying into the kitchen area. He noticed the carton of eggs open on the counter as he looked for the trashcan which he thankfully found under the sink in time for the contents of his stomach to empty into rather than on the floor. With one hand, he pushed himself up, using the counter to support himself, his eyes on the carton of eggs.

He heard Itachi's voice closer to him than before, his mind still focused on the eggs. "What happened? Are you feeling nauseated from the hypothermia? If that was the case, you simply should have said something. I would have fixed something which might have been easier on your stomach."

He found himself staring at his brother, wondering how he'd explain something which in Robin's household was well known. He felt the corner of his mouth twitch slightly. "I'm okay."

"You don't seem okay."

"I just need to lie down a bit."

"You can..."

"On the couch." Sebastian watched his brother's face fall, looking rather miserable for some reason. He wasn't sure what he'd said wrong.

Itachi let out a sigh, folding his arms across his chest. "Fine."

He walked over to the couch, lying down on his back, one arm over this forehead while his stomach churned slightly, his mind telling him he should have told Itachi the truth, which in turn made him cascade back into his own dark thoughts and wanting to sleep. He found himself dozing off, though he started feeling itchy. After a bit, Itachi nudged him awake again. He didn't want to open his eyes, yet he also didn't want to seem impolite, giving the fact he now found himself freeloading at his brother's place, lowering his arm as he did so. "Uh – yes?"

"What the hell is wrong with your arm?"

Sebastian glanced down at his arm, but without hesitation he said. "Oh. That? That's normal."

"That's not normal! Your skin's broken out in a rash as if you had an allergic..." Itachi's tone of voice changed. "Are you an idiot? You told me you were alright, remember."

"I didn't want you to worry." Sebastian looked away, uncomfortable with the anger reflected in her eyes. "No. I didn't want you to blame yourself. You didn't know."

"I didn't know what?" Itachi took a deep breath. "The only thing you had to eat was rice, soy sauce, and egg."

"I'm guessing the egg was raw. Even lightly cooked eggs will do this. Make me break out in hives." He watched Itachi move so he now leaned over him, one hand on the back of the couch so he supported himself, making Sebastian flinch slightly while his brother leaned in close. He found himself leaning back slightly, uncomfortable with how close his brother was. He swallowed.

"Don't act like this isn't a big deal. You almost ended up in the hospital yesterday because of something you did, and you might end up in the hospital today because I fed you eggs!"

"I..." Sebastian took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean..."

Itachi pulled away. He headed towards the kitchen. "I'm calling the doctor again. Just, get some sleep. I'll fix some rice porridge when I'm done."

"Um, okay." Sebastian swallowed feeling bad. He turned his head, looking at Itachi. "Really. I'm sorry. I just – right now I don't feel like I care." He watched Itachi freeze, looking at him as if he said something wrong. "I – I said something wrong again."

Itachi held up his finger, asking for Sebastian to be quiet. "Sorry to bother you again, but what do you do about an allergic reaction." He stood there, glaring at him. "To what? Eating eggs. Symptoms that I know of is breaking out in what he calls hives. Why..." He swallowed. "I didn't know! I honestly didn't. Yeah. I'll see if what I can do about that and call you back if I can't."

Sebastian swallowed, his eyes drifting away as Itachi clicked the phone shut. He took a deep breath, before flopping onto the couch, deciding not to pay any attention to what his brother was doing. He heard him speaking, indicating he was on the phone with someone else. "Hi. I'm calling about Sebastian." He found himself sitting up, his eyes widening, swallowing at the thought he was talking to their father. "What is this about? He's had an allergic reaction, but I was told to call." Itachi nodded his head. "Yeah. Thanks."

When his brother hung up after giving the address of his apartment, Sebastian swallowed, speaking up. "You said you wouldn't call dad."

"I didn't." Except, he couldn't think of anyone else Itachi might be calling. "I called your doctor's office. His nurse said she'll bring some medication for you."

"What?" Sebastian swallowed, knowing that was far worse; she was the last person he wanted to see. He now saw that Itachi had his phone, which he'd not put a password on due to living in such a small town. "Maru's coming here?"

"I'm guessing that's the name of the nurse?"

Sebastian let out a groan, before flopping down onto the couch, taking a deep breath as he did so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tamago Kake Gohan is a Japanese dish often served for breakfast where a raw egg is cracked over steamed rice and soy sauce is typically added.


	15. Half and Half

He felt miserable, his entire body itching and his mind burning. He heard Itachi pacing back and forth in the room while he wondered how Maru would even get there, why she'd even bother after flat out telling him the night before she wasn't wanted – that nobody wanted him. Itachi said the opposite thing or tried saying it. In the back of Sebastian's mind, he believed Maru's word far more than Itachi's, something which absolutely frustrated him.

Itachi also seemed content to let him sleep, or so he thought.

"So, this Maru, what does she look like?"

Sebastian pulled his arm back slightly, letting in the light from the room despite not wanting to. "What?"

"I asked what this Maru person looks like."

He took a deep breath, his mind _definitely_ not liking the direction the conversation was going. "No. Not going to go there."

"Yeah, well, it certainly seemed strange that she's willing to come out here just to deliver some medicine."

"I know what you mean." Sebastian covered his eyes, feeling Maru was the last person who would go out of the way for him. Worse, seeing her would remind him how much he always disappointed her, the family, everyone, including..."

"No, I don't think you do. I mean, it was weird when you said Yuki moved on to someone else. Yet, she's also not the type to try and make someone feel jealous, yet I'm sure she'd have asked, right?"

"Asked what?"

"If you and this Maru were dating."

"She _knows_ Maru and I aren't dating." After all, Yuki met Maru when she was a baby, yet asked questions regarding how she was doing, at least at first until Sebastian's answers back were likely deemed too vague, though every so often the question came up, or he brought it up, venting at her regarding the fact Maru hated him, how Maru..."

"Would she know for sure?"

"She would know for sure because..." Sebastian let out a sigh, getting tired of sleeping, not feeling tired at all. He pushed himself up onto the palms of his hands. "What is with all of these questions?"

"She'll be here soon, yet it's obvious her coming bothered you." Itachi's words made him examine his younger brother carefully before his head turned towards the window. "She said it wouldn't take long. An hour, maybe an hour or two at most."

"That's not possible."

"What do you mean?"

"What time is it?"

"It's around four o'clock."

"Her shift at the clinic doesn't end until after four."

"You know, it's rather creepy that you know her schedule like that." In other words, by Itachi's own words he was the creepy older brother, everyone in Stardew Valley thought he was, or at least he expected everyone to expect him to be some kind of creep, living in the basement in his mother's home like he was.

"Yeah, well, she never deviates from her clinic duties. It's her job." A job which differed greatly from his own in that it was stable and gave a steady income, although he didn't trust Harvey when it came to his sister, yet in the back of his head – he wondered if she'd told Harvey about their conversation the night before, which made the situation even more awkward. " _Why is she coming? I mean, I clearly fucked up last night. I fucked up with Yuki as well. I'm an idiot._ "

"This is a part of her clinic duties, dummy."

"Well, there is that." The thought didn't make him feel any better, nor did hearing a knock at the door. He watched Itachi hurry towards the door, his eyes widening, realizing he'd wasted the time sleeping rather than telling Itachi who Maru was, yet... " _I don't deserve to call myself her older brother. I don't deserve to call myself his older brother either._ "

The door opened. "Uh, hi. I'm Itachi, the person you talked to on the phone."

"I'm Maru. Do you have a place I can set this stuff down?"

"Um, yeah. The counter in the kitchen."

Sebastian swallowed, watching Maru walk into the room as if nothing happened the day before, yet she also acted as if she didn't see him on the couch, heading straight for the open kitchen area. He turned his head, wincing when Itachi tapped his shoulder, which made him itch in that spot even more. He clapped a hand over the spot and looked up at Itachi.

...who was staring at Maru.

"Um..."

"Yeah."

"That's Maru?"

"Yes."

"She's..."

" _Please don't say anything about her skin color. Don't say anything about it Itachi._ "

"She's cute."

"Aren't you dating that doctor?" Why those particular words came out of his mouth, Sebastian didn't know, but his mind clicked, realizing the doctor from the night before was female, the night he found himself stripped of his clothing. His head tilted forward so he might look at his lap and his hands where the hives still were, although having moved around like hives sometimes do. He wanted to itch badly.

"I told you. That's the family doctor."

"I don't remember."

"You don't remember a lot of things."

"It's..."

"Could you possibly show me where the glasses are?"

"Sure."

Sebastian felt his head spin, his mind thinking _this_ couldn't end well, but the idea of his two half-siblings meeting, discussing all his flaws – it made his stomach feel uneasy. Soon, Maru came over, handing Sebastian a glass of water and an allergy pill which would bring him some relief, hopefully, sooner rather than later. He took a sip of water, swallowing the pill.

"Be sure to drink the entire glass."

"Yeah, yeah." He started drinking the water, although he wasn't on the moor for eating or drinking anything at the moment.

"So..." Maru fidgeted uncomfortably, her eyes focused on Itachi. "Do you have a bathtub in this apartment?"

"No."

She took a deep breath, rubbing the back of her neck. "That means I'll have to do something else regardingthose hives. Sebastian is rather particular regarding others seeing him without clothes on, even if it's just a shirt, so..."

Which was true. Sebastian didn't know _why_ such a thing irritated him so much, yet..."

"He didn't have a problem with that last night, plus..."

He watched Maru's facial features flush up, her eyes glued on her hands, making him realize she'd sat down on the couch in front of him, preventing him from lying down, although he was still working on the glass of water she'd given him.

"I'm sorry. Abigail mentioned something, but..." Maru's voice strained. "I didn't realize the two of you had that kind of relationship."

Sebastian choked on the water which suddenly went down the wrong tube, while Itachi spoke in a rather calm manner. "I believe there's been a bit of a misunderstanding."

"Maru!" He looked at her, horrified her mind went in that direction, although she didn't know. "It's fine. Itachi's fine."

Except, it wasn't fine. The fact he'd stood there naked the night before started setting in, yet the topic was something he felt uncomfortable about even in terms of family. What he was trying to say was the fact Itachi was his brother. His eyes closed, his head bowing towards Maru, but his apology for Itachi's ears as well. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for this misunderstanding!"

"Yuishoru, calm down. You don't _need_ to apologize. And..." Itachi then said. "Plus, last night he had a case of hypothermia which I had to call my doctor in on. She's the one who told me..."

"Sebastian! You idiot! And why is he calling you Yuishoru!"

"Uh..." Sebastian glanced at the side, wincing as Maru pulled on one of his cheeks, thankfully when she finally let go. "I go by my middle name, Maru."

"Why is it this complete stranger knows that and I don't! I'm your sister! But you also did something which could have gotten yourself killed."

"Stop pulling my cheeks. I'm really sorry for the misunderstanding. I really, really am."

"How is having hypothermia a misunderstanding! Sebastian..."

"Actually, he's referring to the fact I'm his paternal half-brother, which means you must be his maternal half-sister. And to be fair, I don't get this whole middle name business. Nobody else in our family has a middle name."

Sebastian shut his eyes, definitely feeling as if the awkward situation was killing him, pushing him farther into the darkness of his mind. He tried taking a deep breath, calming himself, not knowing how successful said attempt would be.


	16. Itch

The deep breaths did nothing to calm him down, the silence coming from both of his siblings managing to drive him up the wall with frustration. He wanted one of them to say something, anything which might break the silence. A hand reached up absentmindedly to scratch himself, the itch starting to get the better of him, only for Mary to grab his hand, preventing him from scratching. His eyes snapped open, looking his sister in the eye.

"Don't. I'll get the aloe gel and cold compresses for you." He watched Maru get up, heading into the kitchen area while Ryo watched. Turning his head, he watched Ryo look away. She stopped in her tracks, looking at his brother. In the back of his mind, Sebastian contemplated their initial reaction to each other. While the two weren't related to each other, their reactions still felt weird to him. He watched her look right at Ryo. "How could you not know he's allergic to eggs when they're not incorporated into other foods?"

"I..."

Sebastian nearly choked, watching guilt appear on Ryo's face, something he definitely didn't want to happen. "Maru!"

He watched his sister turn and look at him, her eyes blinking. "Sorry. I didn't mean – I guess it's like me not knowing that Sebastian is actually his middle name." She now glared at him, making his blood run cold. He looked away, swallowing. "Why didn't you say anything? You know you're allergic."

"That wasn't his fault. Not when he didn't realize there was raw egg in what I made."

"Raw..."

"Maru, please." Sebastian continued looking at his lap, his hands placed in his lap while he took deep breaths. He didn't have to look up at either of his siblings to know the two were likely uncomfortable after having found out they were both related to him. His eyes shut closed while letting himself take another deep breath. After a bit of time, Maru sat down in front of him and his eyes opened.

In her hands were a bottle of aloe gel. "Hey."

He swallowed, watching her eyes dart away. Maru took a deep breath. "Look, I know you've major issues with people seeing you naked, even if it's just your shirt off, which is weird, but you can't take care of the hives which are on your back, can you."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"I'm forewarning you, so you don't react negatively." She took a deep breath, before standing up and moving behind him. He felt her move his shirt up which in fact did make him feel uncomfortable even though she was his sister, but he swallowed, telling himself his thoughts were stupid. Despite mentally preparing himself, he flinched, his body moving forward when her fingers attempted putting gel on the hives.

Touch – any touch, was uncomfortable, but somehow he forced himself to not move, which allowed her to place the gel on the other spots. She then handed him the bottle. "Think you can handle the rest?"

"Um, yeah." Sebastian stood up, his eyes looking around, realizing he'd not yet used the bathroom at Ryo's place – in fact desperately needed to. Ryo tilted his head. Sebastian headed in, finding the place pristine, just like the bedroom and the rest of the apartment was. He relieved himself, washed his hands and then proceeded in applying the gel over most of his body, heading back out while the gel stuck to the clothing Ryo lent him.

He saw Maru sitting on the couch, but Ryo was nowhere to be seen. "Um. Is Ryo in his room?"

"Ryo said he was going to go and get something for the three of us to eat, which means you and I can talk."

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Yes! Yes, there is!"

"Look, I'll agree you were right, so would you leave everything alone? I don't know how you got here, but..."

"Leah."

"Who?"

"She's the artist out in the forest. She used it as a chance to visit her parents. Said I could just call her when I was ready to go home, but..."

"Well, you don't have to stay. I'm out of your life like you wanted."

"Idiot!"

Sebastian's eyes closed. Letting out a deep breath, he walked over to the couch, sitting down on the opposite side so he didn't have to be near her. He lifted up one of his feet so he could put the gel on his feet. "Why am I an idiot? You very clearly said I should just leave last night, but apparently, I was an idiot for not realizing that."

"You..." Maru – whatever she was feeling, he didn't look up to see her face. Not until she said. "Here. You need to see this."

He looked up, his eyes picking up on the tears starting to well in her eyes. He swallowed, reaching out for the photo she was handing to him. "Hey. Don't cry Maru. Please don't." He then looked down at the picture, his breath drawing in. The picture was of a girl who looked like Maru, except her hair was brown instead of red, but standing next to her was Doctor Harvey. "What – what is this?"

"That's his daughter."

Sebastian shook his head. "I'm not following. What is this about?"

"It's about you are noticing him acting strange around me and me asking because I wanted to prove you wrong after dad..." Maru took a deep breath. "He's divorced, his wife doesn't let him see his daughter, but he's got to pay child support. He apologized for deflecting that onto me, so you weren't wrong in saying he was acting weird. He said he'll try to be more aware of that in the future, but said I should show that to you when I saw you, but that he does plan on apologizing when he sees you next."

He looked away. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for you to get hurt."

"Sebastian..." Maru took a deep breath. "You were just doing what an older brother should do."

"Really? Because I honestly feel like a major failure in that department. I think it would be the first time I was actually successful regarding that. I mean, we've never gotten along as we should."

"What do you mean?"

His hands tightened despite the hives. "What I mean is all we ever did growing up is argue."

"That's not true."

"Yeah, it is." Sebastian felt his entire body start to shake. He felt his voice stall in his throat. "Don't you hate me? For not being the brother, you've wanted. I mean, I'm seriously fucked up, aren't I?"

He wanted a cigarette, yet he couldn't escape outside for a smoke. In the back of his mind, he knew it was getting close to the time he always went out for a smoke. His eyes closed, feeling so much like an idiot. The silence which unfolded between the two of them didn't help. He eventually looked over, which made him see Maru was musing over what he said.

"Maru?"

"I can't blame you for thinking that, what with how I acted last night, but something tells me you've thought I hated you for some time now."

Sebastian looked away. "Look. I'd rather we not talk about what happened last..."

"Dad chewed me out." Maru's word surprised him.

"Wait. He never..." Sebastian looked away. "He never chews you out for anything."

"He found the letter you left. He demanded to know what happened, and I told him thinking he'd side with me. He said..." Maru stopped.

"What did he say?"

"He said for you to call him dad again – you'd have to either be in a really good place with yourself, but it was far more likely you were in a really bad place."

"I'm not following."

"He wasn't willing to talk about it, saying it wasn't his place, but that calling him dad like you did when we were younger was difficult, that for you to call him dad meant it finally became easy for you to do, or you were desperate and needed him, that something was majorly upsetting you, but that what I did, what I said – it was not only uncalled for, but likely made things worse."

"No, it didn't."

"Says the person whose within the twenty-four hours since then had a case of hypothermia and an allergic reaction." Maru swallowed. "Is mom right in saying that you're not upset regarding Abigail, but instead regarding Yuki? That Yuki's a childhood friend of yours?"

"Yeah. Itachi actually knows her as well." He looked at his hands. "You didn't make things worse Maru. You really didn't."

"Yes..."

"You didn't."

"I'm going to agree to disagree with you on this one."


	17. Strained Silence

After that, they sat in rather awkward silence.

In part, Sebastian didn't know what to say to Maru. He didn't know what to say, beyond the fact he didn't think any of what happened in the last twenty-four hours was her fault, yet she'd insisted on that old adage of politely agreeing to disagree, something he honestly found himself hating, as it often in his mind involved not having a serious conversation. Though, in that regard, he was one to talk given the fact he'd avoided so many serious conversations, worried he might mess up even more.

" _Seriously though. Maru's perfect, and never gets in trouble._ " Yet, the voice in his head said, " _but she actually got chewed out by dad for once. She openly admitted that he was mad at her._ " Another voice, of course, had to bring up, " _he isn't your dad. You know he isn't biologically your father, which makes what Maru said the night before accurate._ " The first voice retorted with, " _Yeah, but he's the man who raised you. You barely got to see your biological father, given the fact he was spending to much time with you._ " The second voice then retorted with, " _Not that you felt like Demetrius' family was your family either._ "

Back and forth it went.

When Sebastian started staring at the ceiling, he didn't know, but one thing he did know for sure. He didn't leave simply because Yuki rejected him, or in the first situation, he thought that was the case. In both cases he never felt like a part of the family, with no place to go, which in turn made running to his brother Itachi – the eldest child of his father's new family who wasn't much younger than himself – it felt strange. It reminded him that his parents' marriage didn't last more than a year, given the age gap.

His father's family didn't approve, so the marriage ended up annulled, yet there was still an end result to said marriage – him, the person who didn't belong with either family.

He remembered other children laughing when he said he had two dads, but also when he'd called Demetrius dad, and someone pointed out Demetrius _couldn't_ be his father because of the difference in the skin color. He definitely didn't _look_ like he belonged in Demetrius' family, being the child who looked like neither parent in the household, standing out like a sore thumb to everyone observing.

This was a good reason, given the fact he looked like his father. His stepmother definitely hated him, purposefully naming her firstborn son a name which meant firstborn son, yet his father did nothing. Whether he could do nothing, Sebastian never asked – Itachi didn't pick the name he was given, or to be born as the second son to his father when Itachi's mother definitely wanted his father's first-born child. She'd never made him feel welcome when he came, but it grew over the years.

"Hey, are you crying?"

Maru's words finally drew him out of his dark thoughts, one hand reaching up to wipe the wetness from his eyes, his ears registering the fact Itachi had returned. "No. I'm not crying."

"Liar."

"Did you remove your shoes when you came in?"

"It was obvious that was the custom, so yes."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to imply..."

"You're trying to convince me you're okay, but you're really not, are you?"

"What happened?"

"Nothing." Sebastian closed his eyes, wishing Itachi hadn't heard Maru say those words.

"I got the food. Why don't the two of you come over to the table while I get some dishes? Oh, and since I didn't know whether you're allergic to anything else..."

"Only raw eggs." Sebastian let out a sigh, wondering what his brother had done.

"Nothing with nuts or seafood."

"That's rather ironic, given the fact his favorite food is sashimi. That, or our mother's pumpkin soup."

"I'll have to keep that in mind for next time."

Sebastian finally opened his eyes. " _How can they act as if everything is normal?_ "

He stood up, shuffling over to the table, only to stop when he remembered the hives were also on the bottom of his feet. Maru, of course, _had_ to notice. "You wouldn't have some socks he could borrow. The hives are all over."

"Um. Sure. I'll be right back." His brother disappeared from the room – heading into his own while Sebastian debated whether or not he should remove. The reappearance of Itachi and a pair of socks answered the question for him. He pulled the socks on but attempted not shuffling over, sitting down in the chair looking at the food with genuine disinterest. When he didn't start eating, Itachi and Maru both started putting food onto his plate.

He didn't feel like touching the food even then. The awkward silence from before continued until Maru cleared her throat. "So, Itachi...."

"Yes?"

"Sebastian, please don't take this the wrong way when I ask him this..."

"Why would I?"

"Because I'm talking about you right in front of you."

"Doesn't matter."

"Yeah, it does."

"Does not."

"How did you deal with him being this distant growing up?"

"How..." The pause in what Itachi was saying made Sebastian look up. "My experience was different. Yui was actually painfully clingy when we were younger."

"I was not."

"You only say that because of mother..." Itachi referring to _that_ women as their mother made Sebastian stiffen up considerable, but his brother seemed to notice. "I mean, my mother, she didn't like the fact Yui always – well, acted differently than what is considered socially acceptable by the family. She..." Itachi took a deep breath. "She was emotionally abusive, though I worry..."

"You shouldn't say that."

"Why the hell not?"

"And Yui is a girl's name."

"That – could you not avoid the question I asked of you? Why can't I talk about..."

"She's your mother."

"It's also true."

'It doesn't matter..."

'Yeah, it does." Itachi let out a sigh. "Look, I know – I knew even before I asked you, that thinking Yuki picked me over you _wasn't_ the only reason you stopped visiting. The way she treated you when dad wasn't around definitely wasn't the same as when he was around, but it definitely sent mixed messages to all of us, but it was completely unfair to you."

"Yeah, well..."

"I'm not finished. I'd not finished earlier when I said she was emotionally abusive, because I was trying to bring up the fact I worried mom – my mother – was also physically abusive – that you didn't say anything, because over time your behavior did definitely change. Whatever she did, you stopped acting like you."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

'Maru – she talks about you not liking to be touched."

"As I said, distant."

"That's not the brother I remember. The brother I remember was clingy, which was sometimes annoying, I admit, as you didn't always know when it was appropriate to do certain things, but I definitely miss the brother who when he showed up when we were really little wouldn't hesitate to hug me, and I'm not into the whole hugging thing, because that's not our family thing to do. But it was you."

"That..." Maru spoke. "Sebastian, you really need to eat."

"I'm not hungry."

"Okay. Then I'm going to make the same threat I did last night. If you don't eat something, I'll call dad and let him know you're here. You know, the guy who normally didn't hug people, but never once hesitated in returning your hugs when he was little, yet continued hugging you even when you stopped saying it was a teenage phase. A guy who doesn't realize you're now uncomfortable with people touching you."

Sebastian now looked at his brother in horror. "Please."

"Oh, and he'll find out about the hypothermia you didn't want him to find out about, which will cause him to completely freak out – not to mention the allergic reaction."

"Itachi!"

"Just eat."

"You're pointing your chopsticks! That's impolite!"

"Well, at least you're being more responsive. Eat. You've not eaten since last night, except for that crap I tried shoving down your throat and honestly regret doing. It may not show on my face, because that's not how we do things in our family – show our emotions, but I'm honestly worried about you, so eat."

Sebastian felt shell shocked, but somehow, his hand started moving on its own accord and he found himself finally eating. He heard Maru breathe a sigh of relief, which made him feel like for once he'd done the right thing. The light started fading outside of the window, but he found himself looking up at the sky. Itachi noticed and said. "Hey, Maru..."

"Yes?"

"It's a bit late for you to be heading back to this Stardew Valley where you and Yuishoru..."

"Live? I know the name Yui is a girl's name, but I like it."

"Maru..."

"Well, it's cute."

"Which is why I prefer my middle name."

"Anyways, stay the night. Sebastian – since that's what you prefer being called, and I can sleep in my room while you take the couch."

"Wait..."

"You're not sleeping on the floor. I'm not going to let you."

"I'll need to call my parents."

Sebastian's blood went cold. "Wait." Panic started setting in. "Demetrius doesn't know you're here?"

"Why would he?"

"Maru! He's your dad! He freaks out all the time."

"He freaks out all the time. Which, I'm guessing you've not smoked once since you've been here, right? One of the things he's always freaking out about way more than mom about, you know, but when he thinks you're not there to hear? Right?"

"Wait. You're smoking."

"It..." Sebastian took a deep breath. "It calms me." Right now, he certainly wasn't calm.

"Look. I'll call mom."

"You're avoiding calling him."

"Uh, no. If I get him, I'll still have him put her on the phone. She's actually freaked regarding your little stunt of taking off yesterday."

"Mom freaks if I get a minor scratch in the caves!"

"You ran away from home Sebastian!"

"I'm a grown adult, living in..." He stopped mortification setting in. He'd been standing up, but then sat down.

"You know, there's nothing wrong with living with your parents."

"Yeah, but I'm the walking cliché – the kid in their parent's basement, a good for nothing..."

"Stop that! Dad says the issue isn't that you're some good for nothing, but that you don't believe in yourself."

"Um, maybe we should discuss this in the morning?" Itachi said. "Finish eating, get to bed as you're still recovering from hypothermia and an allergy attack, but in the morning, if there's anyone else you need to talk to – like Yuki...

"No, not Yuki." Sebastian got up, heading into the bedroom in an attempt to escape. After a bit, Itachi came in, finding him sitting on the bed.

"Look. I put the rest of your food in the fridge. You can have it as a late-night snack. Maru says you tend to eat late anyway, but she also said Yuki got together with a girl, which I don't for once believe."

"I saw it."

"Yeah, I don't think Yuki swings that way, but she waited for you..." Itachi took a deep breath. "Look, call this Sam friend of yours tomorrow. I asked Maru if there was anyone else who might be worried about you, and she said Sam would be. In the meantime, get a good night's sleep."

Sleep didn't feel as if it would come easy, but he lay down in the bed as Itachi wanted.


	18. Good Night

He tried getting to sleep but found himself struggling with doing so. Sebastian started on his side, staring at the wall, before turning onto his back so he could look at the ceiling. In the back of his mind, he didn't feel tired, likely because he slept for so long. Worse, thoughts rattled around in his head regarding what happened during the last few days. "Perhaps I should just leave."

"Why are you thinking of leaving?"

Sebastian felt his heart pound in his throat, hearing his brother's voice as he entered the room. He knew he would end up dealing with Itachi due to the fact they would end up sharing a room again. He didn't feel comfortable being close to anybody. In fact, when he stayed the night over at Sam's place he often slept on the floor or the couch. Of course, he didn't respond to what his brother said, and turned onto his side so he couldn't look Itachi in the eye.

"Seriously, why are you thinking of leaving?"

He took a deep breath, then let it out. "Because I don't want to be a burden."

"You're not."

"I am." What else did you call a brother who showed up on your doorstep randomly, who ended up never contributing anything; it didn't matter only a few days passed between when he arrived.

"Does this have to do with the fact..." Itachi let out a sigh, yet Sebastian heard his brother shuffling around the room. Apparently, he didn't feel uncomfortable changing around others as Sebastian did, but eventually, he got onto the other side of the bed. There didn't feel like much room between them, making him feel slightly claustrophobic. "Look..."

"I can sleep on the floor."

"You are not sleeping on the floor."

"You can't force me not to." Sebastian sat up, fully preparing to leave the bed, only to freeze upon looking his brother in the eye. He didn't understand how Itachi could be so okay with such situations.

"Right now you're being irrational."

"What?"

"For some reason, you're thinking being close to anybody is wrong. Actually, that might not quite be it." Itachi looked away. "You may think being near someone platonically is wrong."

"Well..."

"Seriously. If someone gets the wrong impression it's their fault, not your own. We're brothers, so us sharing a bed isn't some weird thing, so please stop treating it as if it were."

"Yeah, but if Maru and I..."

"Maru is a girl. I'm a guy."

"And?"

Itachi let out a sigh, but he didn't speak at first. "There's a certain point you stop doing certain things with a family member who's the opposite sex as you, so I guess I'm saying it would have been completely okay when Maru was younger. The real point.... " Itachi looked him in the eye. "There is nothing wrong with this arrangement, you're not sleeping on the ground and neither am I. Plus, I'd rather be near in case something else manages to happen to you during the middle of the night, so please, for my peace of mind stay put."

"For your peace of mind?"

"For my peace of mind."

"Fine." Sebastian lay down, yet still felt strange regarding the situation.

He also thought the conversation was over, but then Itachi said. "While it is true you may live in your mom's basement, you aren't relying on dad's money either."

"You're just trying to be nice."

"I'm trying to think of your situation positively since you won't."

Sebastian let out a sigh, then pushed himself up. "Look. I can't sleep as I'm not tired, but apparently, you want to talk, so let's talk, though to be honest, I don't see any difference between you – no strike that, I'm mooching off my mother and can definitely say I'm not doing anything productive with my life, but you – you're here attending college, right?" He watched Itachi look away. "See. That's why you got away from the family because you're going away from college."

"I also could have attended school a lot closer."

"It wouldn't be the school father attended though, would it?"

"Which was where he met your mother, so she definitely wouldn't want me going to that particular university." Itachi looked at his hands. "What happened between you and Yuki. Be honest."

"Don't you already know? I mean, Maru told you."

"I hear Mary's side of it, not yours."

Sebastian let out a sigh, leaning back and closing his eyes. "To be honest, I messed up by avoiding her. I mean, she deserves better – someone like..."

"Don't say me. Where did you even get the idea that Yuki and I were a thing."

"Your mother."

"My mother." Itachi let out a sigh. "This conversation became very weird. Just, tell me what happened."

"I don't know. I mean, we talked, decided we were strangers and that our relationship couldn't go back to the way it was, though that's honestly not what I wanted..."

"Something tells me if I ask Yuki, she'll tell me a different story."

"Um, no. She really did say that, that we were strangers to each other now, and that she was sorry for the fact things weren't going back to the way they were."

"Seriously, I think you're taking her words..."

Sebastian ignored his brother. "I mean, that was after I'd walked out of the arcade at the saloon when she showed up."

"You're an idiot."

"I'm aware of that."

"I don't think you are."

"We'll disagree on that, but then the flower dance happened, I thought about asking her because..." He stopped, the words stuck on his tongue. He also wasn't sure how one couldn't be aware of the fact they were an idiot when they openly admitted such. He heard Itachi laugh. "What?"

"The fact you can't verbalize you have feelings for her doesn't mean it isn't obvious you do."

"Tell that to the people who think I had – have – a thing for Abigail, who is the girl who Yuki danced with, so no, I didn't get to ask her."

"You're also not aware of the conversation which went down between them, are you?"

"Well, no. Your point."

"You don't know if Yuki turned this Abigail person down."

"She wouldn't have danced..." In the back of his mind, he remembered how Abigail ended up dragging Yuki away to dance, cutting off his chance to ask Yuki to dance with him, but also how he felt about wearing that ridiculous suit, pulling at the collar thinking things might actually turn out differently when they didn't.

"Look, you've not heard Yuki's side of things. Give her the benefit of the doubt, particularly since I'll be furious with you if she doesn't actually become a part of the family despite already being like family." Sebastian stared at his brother, but then Itachi added something else. "Look... I know all of this is hard for you to understand, the fact she does care about you, but... never mind." Itachi let out a deep breath. "Have a good night.


	19. Okay

The conversation didn't help him fall asleep, but eventually, he did. When he woke up, he discovered Itachi was already awake. His dark eyes darted around the room, looking for his brother only to discover that Itachi was nowhere to be seen. Taking a deep breath, he sat up, wondering how he'd actually gotten a good night's sleep, given the fact he shared a bed with Itachi.

Looking down at his arms, he discovered the hives covering his body were gone. Sebastian flexed his fingers, taking in the fact his body no longer itched because of the hives. He let out a sigh of relief, his eyes drifting towards the door. He slipped out of the bed, carefully putting his side of the bed back together before slipping from the room, discovering Mary and Itachi speaking with each other.

He wasn't sure what they were speaking about, although something told him they were possibly discussing him. After all, before going to bed Itachi mentioned something about having leftovers in the fridge. This didn't make him feel comfortable, yet he remembered there might still be leftovers in the fridge. He thought about going for them, yet noticed Itachi cooking in the kitchen making something to eat while Maru watched.

He shuffled over to the couch, sitting down and watching them, still unaware of what their conversation involved. He thought they didn't notice him and so he sat there observing. He noticed his computer was no longer upside down draining but set out on the counter. His mind focused on the door when a knock came. Maru pushed herself away from the counter. "That must be Leah. She's here to pick me up." She walked over and hugged him, making him tense up. "Come home when you're ready."

Itachi stopped doing whatever he was doing in the kitchen right after the door opened and closed behind Maru, his eyes focusing in on Sebastian sitting there. "How are you feeling?"

"Okay, I guess." His eyes drifted down towards the ground, wondering he shouldn't just head home and deal with the fact he was stuck living at home in his mother's basement, not to mention the fact he found himself feeling like an idiot for taking off as he did after his conversation with Maru the night before, because, " _maybe she does care._ " His eyes closed, unsure of anything.

"Well, you might want to test out your computer to see if it works. I left it to drain on my kitchen counter, but I attempted to not knock it over. I mean, I didn't know it over and avoided potentially bumping it, so I hope it works."

"Um, okay." He simply remained there, watching, taking everything in.

"Also, your laundry is in the bathroom in a basket. I figured you would prefer folding it yourself. I put your essential items in there as well, but before you say anything, you're staying."

"Wait. What?" Sebastian looked at his brother, confused regarding why his brother would do such things – insist on such things.

"I said your staying."

"But..."

"Don't say you're going to be a burden. I am hoping your computer works because isn't that how you do your work?"

"What?"

"Look, we were talking about this last night, that dad is paying for the apartment and my schooling."

"No. I don't recollect that."

"Okay, maybe I framed it as relying on dad's money."

"Can we not talk about dad?" Sebastian felt uncomfortable with that particular subject. His eyes drifted down, not wanting to talk to the man when he'd ultimately ended up a failure in that man's eyes as well.

"Yeah. That's why I didn't mention the fact he knows about your freelance work."

Sebastian let out a curse under his breath. "Well, I guess he's real proud of the fact I can't hold down a steady job."

"You know he could get you a steady job if you wanted."

"I don't want to be a burden."

"I've told you. You're not a burden." Itachi looked away. "You just need some time to get your head on straight."

'Yeah, sure."

"And dad really would give you a job."

"I don't want a handout from him. I mean, me, joining the family business with my skills."

"Are you kidding? Your computer programing skills he keeps talking about is more than I have. I'm not even sure what I want to get a degree in let alone specialize in, yet you've already got that and at a company which is tech-based – well, your computer programming skills are ideal."

"I'm not into the corporate thing."

"Yeah, well, you wouldn't have to be tied down. Dad would give you a lot of freedom. How can you not see that? Why do you sell yourself short."

"I don't."

"So, why don't you check your computer out, make sure it's running. Once you get that done, you can call your friend. Also, I'm making something to eat, but your food from last night is still in the fridge."

"You bought it." Sebastian looked at his hands, letting out a sigh. He got up and pulled himself up to the counter, pulling his computer towards him, hoping he could get the computer to actually work. One hand reached behind his head, massaging the back of his head. He watched his computer weird to live, a thought crossing his mind. "I'll pay you back."

"You'll... seriously?"

"I'll figure out something."

"You know, if it doesn't work, ask dad for a new one or to help with repairs."

"No."

"And what are you going to do? Get a job at some kind of fast-food restaurant."

"I guess."

"You guess?" Itachi let out a sigh, just as a plate of food – no eggs – was pushed towards him. "How are you going to hold down a normal job when you struggle this much having a simple conversation with me? And I'm your brother? Maru is your sister, yet you're not comfortable around either one of us. How do you think you'll handle yourself in the real world?"

"I said I'll figure something out."

"You'll figure something out."

His computer definitely worked, but he found himself staring at the screen, but then heard Itachi sit down beside him. "You don't have to try and figure out something on your own. I'm going to help you."

"I don't..." Sebastian looked up at his brother, but Itachi shook his head.

"Don't. You're not a burden, nor is this a hand out."

"I'll pay you..."

"Don't say that again either, particularly when you know dad's already paying for everything here. If you really don't want dad involved in your life, then guess what – I'm going to be involved, because if you walk out that door, I'm going to tell him everything that happened yesterday and the night before."

"That's blackmail."

"It's keeping you from doing something else, something which might result in you getting in trouble. You need to learn to accept help from people. You need help." Itachi looked away. "And... call your friend Sam. Let him know you're okay. Think about writing Yuki. Tell her the truth. But above all else, stay. Stay for my peace of mind, at least for now. Okay."

"Okay."


End file.
